Of late, the boys have started this group message thread to whittle away the hours while pretending to work and yet still reap the benefits of a real paycheck. Like all the best Seinfield, the thread is mostly about nothing: BSing each other and counting down the minutes until happy hour. Since my phone has sold its digital soul to the ‘robot devil’ (i.e. it broke), I could not read these messages or in truth comment on them. Luckily, last Easter I lost my cellphone down a storm-drain while stomping on it with my right heel. It will not be missed. My subsequent purchase of an iPhone opened a doorway to a whole new world of texting and communication. Moreover, I can now chat with my brothers while they work during these June days and I contemplate my next blog post in my PJs at home. Teaching does have its merits.
The following conversation delved into how my presence has affected the Groupchat (as they dub it) for better or for worse. If you, dear reader, find these conversations interesting, I might try to post a few more now and then.
This may require a little explanation before we begin. My sister, Bree, just recently started dating Paul, a surrogate prom date after her initial choice (Bob) had abandoned her to go fishing with his father. My old history teacher and friend of the family introduced Bree to Paul, and . . . well, they’ve been attached ever since. This is not as widely celebrated as one might think. Her 18th birthday is next week and since no one in our family is ‘allowed’ to date prior to their eighteenth birthday, her love life has sparked quite the controversy. Sean is already calling ‘foul,’ and Shannon relies upon this incident to expose the favoritism that Mom and Dad show to the youngest in the family.
“1) She did not have to take a nap during the summer, 2) she gets a cell phone — an iPhone no less — before I ever did, 3) she already has her learners, a whole year before any of us could even take Drivers’ Ed, and 4) now she’s dating before her eighteenth birthday? Injustice, I say! Call for the guillotine! No cake for you, dear mother!” (Shannon just saw the latest trailer to Assassin’s Creed: Unity, so he’s ready to storm the Bastille.)
Anyway, this kid apparently has the same likes and dislikes and yours truly; thus, I’m the one who has to pick up his graduation present, because — and I quote — ‘He’s a total nerd, just like you Murph.’ So anyway, the guys had their suggestions: