The Groupchat: For the Wookie

Of late, the boys have started this group message thread to whittle away the hours while pretending to work and yet still reap the benefits of a real paycheck.  Like all the best Seinfield, the thread is mostly about nothing: BSing each other and counting down the minutes until happy hour.  Since my phone has sold its digital soul to the ‘robot devil’ (i.e. it broke), I could not read these messages or in truth comment on them.  Luckily, last Easter I lost my cellphone down a storm-drain while stomping on it with my right heel.  It will not be missed.  My subsequent purchase of an iPhone opened a doorway to a whole new world of texting and communication.  Moreover, I can now chat with my brothers while they work during these June days and I contemplate my next blog post in my PJs at home.  Teaching does have its merits.

The following conversation delved into how my presence has affected the Groupchat (as they dub it) for better or for worse.  If you, dear reader, find these conversations interesting, I might try to post a few more now and then.

Dialogue_paul
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Word Play

Tonight while Mom and Dad braved the cold and frigid winds to attend a wedding, the kids and I tucked into our bed clothes and played some board games. Our game of choice was Balderdash, a wonderful game of creativity lies, archaic words, and fake definitions. Needless the say, I love this game, whose principal purpose involves creating definitions for obscure words and then trying to uncover the true definition among the false. Players receive points not only for guessing the correct definition, but for tricking others into choosing your own. Unfortunately, not everyone takes the game all that seriously. Between the following definitions can you guess which ones are fabricated, authentic, and one of my bored brothers’:

Amaranth

· an imaginary flower that never dies

· love of ancient Chinese folklore

· a chemical used that was believed to make someone fall in love with another goat

Ollecranon

· the funnybone

· an element used to convert crude oil to gasoline

· a person from Olekron

Tragelnaschalia

· excessive body odor emanating from the armpits

· a disease infecting most sailors who have traveled to the Gold Coast of West Africa

· the gay guy from the female sex

Oneirocritic

· an interpreter of dreams

· black credit

· one of those pricks who still refuse to acknowledge the greatness that is Boondock Saints

Thrunter

· a 3-year-old female sheep

· a person looking for a foreign object

· a hyper rabbit (‘Hey, they call me Thrunter ‘cause I like to thrunt!)

Zori

· a thronged Japanese sandal

· the wife of Zorro

· outfits that Chinese prostitutes wear

Ennead

· nine of anything

· an epic sea voyage

· someone who is in need of something, ya heard?

Mancinism

· favoring the left hand

· the belief that the world is flat

· extreme affection for a mannequin or doll